I MISS IT I MISS IT I MISS IT 
Today as I was doing these ridiculous maths questions in the first chapter of my $200 dollar maths text book that I'd bought for a one-semester-long maths paper, I thought to myself: "Why am I doing this?" Why? I never liked maths, never will, and it's definitely impossible for me to even begin to like the boring and unsatisfying multi-choice maths questions I have to do for this course.
WHY AM I NOT DOING DESGIN?
Sigh. Because this is the practical and successful and foolproof pathway through life. Comp sci will guarantee a good, relatively high paying job upon graduation. It requires me to take out no student loan as the three-year-degree fits nicely inside my three-year-scholarship. Upon graduation I work, I earn money, I do whatever the hell I want, get life experience, save up, travel, explore, live... then BAM I'm rich and happy and still in my ripe early 20s.
From here on the ideal scenario would be; BAM I decide to go to design school and become qualified to chase my childhood dreams, work hard for a few years then BAM, get pulled out into the ultimate dream job which incorporates both design and comp sci so nothing was a waste of time and money, then BAM, I get married to the perfect guy, have darling little children while still living the designer dream, get another IT job to earn more money, BAM buy a house, BAM buy a car, BAM BAM BAMbuy have three more kids, buy parents three more houses, a boat and a car and a clone of me to keep around (so I'm with them all the time), until finally BOOM my life comes to a breath-taking orgasmic peak of happiness, and ahhhh I dwell in the pleasant ecstasy of the aftermath of my success.
Anyways, that's the safe life. Everyone has a safe life plan and a "The Ultimate Dream Adventure of Life Life plan" If you've ever seen the movie A Walk to Remember, the main character is a girl dying of leukaemia. She (predictably) makes a list of all the things that she wants to do before she dies.
However a few months ago I read the most beautiful story based on that idea. It was hauntingly beautiful. Made my heart jizz tbh :) <3 So here is my list:
10: ...
You know what? It's too hard... life's too full of amazing things that I still want to do. I really don't know what to put on it yet
J
Today as I was doing these ridiculous maths questions in the first chapter of my $200 dollar maths text book that I'd bought for a one-semester-long maths paper, I thought to myself: "Why am I doing this?" Why? I never liked maths, never will, and it's definitely impossible for me to even begin to like the boring and unsatisfying multi-choice maths questions I have to do for this course.
WHY AM I NOT DOING DESGIN?
Sigh. Because this is the practical and successful and foolproof pathway through life. Comp sci will guarantee a good, relatively high paying job upon graduation. It requires me to take out no student loan as the three-year-degree fits nicely inside my three-year-scholarship. Upon graduation I work, I earn money, I do whatever the hell I want, get life experience, save up, travel, explore, live... then BAM I'm rich and happy and still in my ripe early 20s.
From here on the ideal scenario would be; BAM I decide to go to design school and become qualified to chase my childhood dreams, work hard for a few years then BAM, get pulled out into the ultimate dream job which incorporates both design and comp sci so nothing was a waste of time and money, then BAM, I get married to the perfect guy, have darling little children while still living the designer dream, get another IT job to earn more money, BAM buy a house, BAM buy a car, BAM BAM BAM
Anyways, that's the safe life. Everyone has a safe life plan and a "The Ultimate Dream Adventure of Life Life plan" If you've ever seen the movie A Walk to Remember, the main character is a girl dying of leukaemia. She (predictably) makes a list of all the things that she wants to do before she dies.
However a few months ago I read the most beautiful story based on that idea. It was hauntingly beautiful. Made my heart jizz tbh :) <3 So here is my list:
10: ...
You know what? It's too hard... life's too full of amazing things that I still want to do. I really don't know what to put on it yet
My philosophy is that if it scares the heck out of you, then it's worth doing. Alternatively you could just pick the least boring option. I wonder if this has any implications for my career choice...
ReplyDeleteI think my parents would honestly rather I had a safe life than the odds of me having either a spectacular life or a spectacular life that then goes downhill as something turns terribly wrong..
ReplyDeleteThe thing is that, you always knew what you wanted to do.
I still fantasize about our childhood dreams of become an author :( And it makes me sad. Feels like I just wasted all those years on a dream that will never be.